Tonight my sisters and friends went down to Lawrence for a Regency/Jane Austen dance. Filled with a lot of fun (although a little more complicated than last year) dances and conversation, all of us had an incredibly fun time.
Yet more awesome than the dancing, something we only get to experience about once a year, was an interaction with a certain young man who set the bar for how all girls should be treated.
This young man asked many girls to dance – some who had been sitting out due to lack of partners. He was courteous and pleasant to everyone there. He thanked his partner for the dances. He had made an effort in getting ready for the evening and was dressed in a black suit with dress shoes and a tie. While his actions during the dance were both memorable and commendable, his actions after the dance were even more so.
While us girls and Dad were getting ready to head out for the night, he had walked out with his coat on (by the way, gentlemen, if you wish to impress a girl, wear a wool trench coat and a fedora). He held the door open for the girls and offered to take one of our plates that we were taking out. After walking us to the car, he asked if he could open the door for me. I replied of course, and made sure to thank him.
Dad later informed us that, as he was talking to the young man when all of the girls had gotten into the car that he had always been taught by his mom to open up doors and carry things for girls. It was usually unacceptable by the girls though. So for us to thank him for his chivalry was not the usual reaction.
BOYS: Please understand that if you want to make a girl feel like a million bucks, treat us like a lady. Open the door for them (in the car and in buildings). Ask them if they need help carrying things. Walk them to their cars if it is dark. The reason this is so impressive is because it is so rare.
GIRLS: Appreciate the guy’s efforts. Like our situation tonight showed, gratitude is often not the usual reaction. It will make the guy’s day if he knows that what he does to go the extra mile is appreciated. You have to make sure that you are acting like a lady to be treated so, though. If you are throwing yourself at a guy and doing the pursuing yourself, he doesn’t feel that he has to treat you like someone special.
Ultimately, it comes down to this. If you think that there are no guys out there who will treat you like a lady, then think again. They are out there. They exist. So (for guys) be that gentleman and (for girls) thank them.
God bless you all!