This is Where I Draw the Line
How Do You Determine Boundaries in Dating?

How far is too far?
     The question of how far is too far to go with your boyfriend/girlfriend has been around forever.  Basically it is asking: “How far can I go without this being considered a sin?”
Yet when you look at this, the question in itself is pretty selfish.
Now Sit Back and Listen to Story…
   There was once a daughter of a king who lived in  a kingdom far away.  She was absolutely beautiful and was now eligible for marriage.  Three young men had expressed interest in her hand and her father, the King, gathered the three together for a test on a cliff overlooking the ocean.
   “I want to see how each of you could protect my daughter.  While riding on your horse at a gallop, how close can you get to the cliff without going over?”
     The young men whispered amongst themselves and the first man stepped forward.
   “Sire, I can get your daughter one foot away from the edge of the cliff without falling over.”  The King nodded, and motioned for the man to ride.  Urging his horse into a gallop, the young man quickly approached the edge of the cliff, and skidded to a stop.  A servant ventured forward to measure the distance between the cliff and the rider.  Indeed, there was one foot between them and the edge of the cliff.  There was applause, and the young man dismounted and bowed, proud to show how well he could protect the princess.
     The second young man stepped forward, puffing up his chest in pride. 
     “Sire, I could easily get only six inches from the edge of the cliff before stopping.”  The King motioned for the second man to ride.  Sweat dripping from his brow, the young man hurried his horse along until he came to where he believed he should stop, and the horse slided in.  The servant once again rushed over and lo and behold, there were only six inches between the horse and the edge of the cliff.  The crowd broke into incredible applause and eagerly turned to the third young man.  He confidently walked up to the king, leaving his horse behind.
    ” Sir, it would be my first duty as your daughter’s husband to protect her from all harm.  I would try to keep her as far away as possible from the edge of the cliff because I love her and I could never put her in harms way.” 
   The King and princess smiled at each other.  The King reached for the young man’s hand.
   “Young man, that is the correct answer.  You have won my daughter’s hand.”
And Now Your Wondering…
   What does this have to do with anything?  OK, look at it this way.  Your boyfriend/girlfriend may not be your future spouse.  They may be, but they might be someone elses husband or wife in the future.  If this is true, and you are called to the vocation of marriage, then somewhere out there is your future wife or future husband.
    You wouldn’t want your future spouse’s current boyfriend/girlfriend to do anything with them to compromise his or her purity. 
     So you shouldn’t do anything that would compromise your current boyfriend or girlfriend’s purity.  Wouldn’t it be amazing that, at their marriage (if they do not marry you) that their wife/husband came up to you and thanked you for protecting their bride/groom’s purity?
If you really love me
    If your really love your boyfriend/girlfriend, you want what is best for them right?  What about what is best for their souls?  Look at your current physical involvement with them and ask these questions:

   – Is what I am doing right now something that is leading my  
     boyfriend/girlfriend closer to God?

   – Is this something  I would be OK doing if Jesus was sitting

   – Is this a Heaven decision or a pleasure decision?


Learning from example:   Reading an article from lifeteen this week, this was the quote that stuck with me: “Learn from the world’s first couple: Adam and Eve. When your desires become more attractive than your partner’s salvation, eventually you’ll fall.”
Thoughts or comments?  Are you committed to purity in your relationships?  Let me know below!
God Bless,

Chloe M. 

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